Wednesday, 5 November 2014

One ring to bind us?

This was started at a draft when the ring first arrived and since then I have been very busy with work, wedding prep and life in general.  To provide some insight, here is the post now finished.

I am sorry but being a geek I could not fail to at least make some "One ring" joke so I figured I would get that over and done with in the title.

The ring finally arrived on Saturday ages ago which is fantastic.  I could not be more excited about this unless I was Nikki, she was ever so slightly more excited.  I guess first there should be some pictures...

So why did the ring take so long to arrive given we were engaged *weeks* ago.  Well the simple answer is I decided before asking Nikki to marry me that this is something we should work on together and I am very glad that we went down this path.

Rewind about a year and I had started looking into engagement rings.  I had an idea what I thought was a nice ring and the internet was great at providing images.  After a few months I had a fairly firm idea what was going to be the perfect ring.  However as many things do in this life this required money and at the time this was in short supply.  I could have just asked earlier and been happy with any ring and there is no doubt in my mind this would not have changed at thing.  We would still be getting married and we would still be happy together.  All the important things would still be right.  I have this silly notion in my head that old sayings have meaning, like wisdom passed down from the ages.  From the old notion that an engagement ring should cost $x * $monthly_salary I have taken to mean the general idea is that you should be able to support yourself and your partner before getting any ideas of getting married.  This while not exactly how I feel about the whole thing I personally feel is still generally a good idea.  If your life is chaotic and so messy that saving up for even a simple ring is beyond your bounds then maybe you should not be trying to attach your life to someone else for all eternity.

Enough of my crazy notions and back to the ring.  Once I had the money together and some sort of a plan on what I wanted to do I started looking into what ring I would like.  I spent a lot of time researching and not a lot of action which I guess is very typical me.  By the time I had gotten around to the action part and found a ring maker I liked the timings were getting a bit tight.  On my first chat with Rare Pink the ever lovely and patient Sean suggested the idea of a placeholder ring.  Maybe either something like what I wanted to buy or just a simple ring that could then be replaced.  I am very happy I went for this option as the ring you see above is nothing like the one I would have chosen and I am very happy we took a more modern approach and worked on the ring together.

I cannot recommend Rare Pink enough, while of course the company name held some personal appeal for me it was Sean that put me at ease and we had a great time doing the initial design chat and everything was just as we had expected.

While the above ring might look quite simple like the both of us there is something a little special underneath.  At the foot of the diamond is a garnet on one side and an amethyst on the other.  One stone for each of us.  What I love about this is what it says, while each we are small and we bring colour to the equation together we are a great big sparkling light.

Anyhoo, more coming very shortly all.

Peace, love and happiness.

Friday, 5 September 2014

Bridesmaids, Wedding dress and all that other fun stuff x

Well another update to our wedding blog to keep all of you informed and looking forward to our big day! The start of the wedding plans is happening which is exciting and fun. Decided on my Maid of honour and my bridesmaids *Drum roll please* Natalie, Nicola and Sam. 

Natalie, who I have known for the past seven years will be my Maid of Honour to which she is super excited about. We met when we started college at the same time and had the same lecturer for our psychology class and just hit it of as friends and remained so ever since. Nicola, as many of you know has been a life long friend of Rob's as they went to school together and have remained great friends over the years. Finally Sam, Rob's little sister (she even has the tattoo to prove it :) she is my soon to be sister in law is my final bridesmaid. I know with these three my live as a bride to be will be silly, fun, full of laughter and excitement, and it might even get a little bit crazy! 

Now that I have my three wonderful ladies I am certainly going to need their help as they are all aware. The past month I have been looking into wedding dresses and finding out lots of things along the way. Which has made me decide to go *somewhere, where no one knows except my bridesmaids and Rob*. My dress is going to remain a mystery to everyone except my bridesmaids until the big day, not even Rob knows what I want, he just knows where I am going. So I am getting them down here for the end of September as that is when my appointment is which I am super excited about and can't wait for.

But of course it is not just one thing happening at a time, no, no life would be boring that way. Rob and I are moving house to somewhere else in Reading within the next few weeks and will be in our new place for just two weeks before we have a house full of guests which we are excited about! But also I have my final essay due for my Open University course and picking my next modules all before we move. Not to forget EMF camp, and of course castle viewing to pick our venue for our big day! Lots of fun exciting times ahead :). 

Lots of Love 
Nikki xxx

Wednesday, 6 August 2014

Dealing with awkwardness before our big day

This post is mainly about me and how I am dealing with some awkwardness so I will not have to on our wedding day. I am writing this post so I will not be asked on our special day why my mother is not invited to or at the wedding.


As many of you know I am an only child and my mother was a single parent and while we were close once we are not any longer. I have only seen my mother twice in the last three years and these two times have not been pleasant or happy. My mother is not the nicest person to try and get along with at the best of times. In fact the times we did see each other were uncomfortable for me as well as upsetting. We were close once, but even then there was tension between us and it grew due to several different issues along the years taking us to where we are now.


It was not an easy decision to make about my mother not being invited as I am sure every girl dreams about not only having their parents there to support them through one of the biggest days in their lives but to share in their excitement and I will not have that. This is where the problem lies.


I called my mother to tell her the good news on the Friday, the day after Rob proposed to me and I said yes. She was not happy for me like a mother should be for their child. She first complained that she was not the first to know (That was a certain Mr D! :)). Not only that but a bunch of other things too. The final straw came when she was very insulting and hurtful to not only me but Rob and our engagement, making me glad we did not tell her first. The things she said I will never be able to forgive her for and I know this.


Maybe if on the Tuesday when I had cooled off and called her she had said sorry but instead she said "If that's the way you feel about it tough.". Making me take the stance I have which will not change which is hard because I would love to be able to share my excitement and happiness with her as she is the only family I have. But that being said I do have some other rather lovely people to share my excitement with who are truly wonderful! Which makes me a very happy bride to be.


If you wish to ask me questions about it please do, I really do not mind and you know where to find me. But I do ask that no one asks us about this on our big day please.

Lots of love Nikki x

Monday, 28 July 2014

The start of planning our wedding

Since Rob asked me to marry him at one minute past midnight, on the 10th of July this year, I have been looking into everything wedding based to get some ideas for our own special day as well as asking friends for advice and help. When I think of one thing they mention five more that I haven't even considered! 

That being said however we do have some things that we definitely know which is helping us along the way. One is that we want to get married in Scotland on the 31st of January 2015. We have chosen that date because it is a unique date for us. It is the one day between our birthdays, mine being the 30th of January and Rob being the 1st of February. 

The second thing we know is that we want to get married in a castle. This has been Rob's dream for a long time and its one that I find truly romantic, even though picking a castle for our big day is hard we are narrowing them down and flying up to Scotland in August to pick the one for us. 

We also know that since neither of us are religious that our ceremony will be a humanist one and we are still looking into who will be marrying us. We have also picked some people who we want to be part of our big day and need to ask more. 

Slowly we are working out what we want and what we don't, like a Borg cube as our wedding cake, even if it looks cool we aren't having one.     

Every story has a beginning

As has been said many times every story has a beginning and this is no exception.  Just over three years ago now I met this wonderful girl called Nikki and we went on our first date.  As is no secret to our friends for me this was meant to just be a practice date after my previous relationship and for Nikki I was just some random guy to meet up with.  However clearly more happened.

Part of the reason it was just meant to be a practice date for me is I had a lot going on in my life at the time.  My first business had just failed and I had made a few other mistakes in my life and I was planning vaguely to move and start a fresh somewhere new and exciting.  Me being me of course this was all just a vague idea at the time and I had not settled on any details but suffice to say I had no plans for a long term relationship.

However after meeting Nikki for the first time I was intrigued to say the least and so the dating continued.  I did then all of a sudden make plans to move away which I was very open about however I was fortunate enough that Nikki was willing to continue to see where things went with us.

Fast forward a month of me driving from one end of the UK to the other and while I was very much enjoying the dates it was taking a toll on me and my continued sanity.  I asked Nikki to move in with me and she said yes and then the chaos and fun really began.  We had two dogs, two cats, a whole house and one Nikki to move from one end of the country.  However with the help of my good friend Duncan we managed this and started living a very happy life in a nice little town called Trowbridge.

But, how did we get to all this wedding chaos I hear you ask somehow magically from the other end of the internet and before you have even read this blog (yes I am guessing).  Well we continued to have a very fun existence together.  I found Nikki to be very kind, willing to put up with my randomness, fun to go out and play with and was here for the good times and the bad.  What more could you ask of a life long partner.  Given this I decided I had found my sweetheart and it was time to not just let her know (as I think she already did) but to announce this to the whole world in the traditional way.

I did this by being as obvious as I thought I could be.  I booked a room with a balcony view of the Eiffel Tower in Paris for our three year anniversary and I had been busy plotting both what I was going to do and all of the associated details.  I had figured Nikki might have noticed however to this day she assures me that she had no idea that I had planned on one minute past midnight on the 10th of July 2014 to ask her to marry me.  Being the traditionalist I am I did of course get down on one knee however rather than with the final ring I had a placement ring as I had been talked into the more modern way of choosing the final engagement ring together.  If I am honest I am very glad I did.

Of course me being me and jumping into whatever I want to do next I had no idea that what I thought was one simple and obvious question would lead to so many more.  When is the wedding?  Who is coming?  Who will be the best man and maid of honor? and the list goes on and on.  So to try and keep me sane during all of this and to help all of our friends see what we are doing and answer their questions I came to what I know, the internet.

This is something I have always dreamed of and always wanted, while it is more typical for girls to think of their wedding day I know I have always thought of what mine would be like and I am blessed to have someone beside me who wants to go along this journey with me.

Finally we will both be posting what we are up to on here which given the subject seems fitting.  This is our journey and so we should document this together.

Love, peace and happiness.